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xkcd Phone 12 - xkcdフォン 12


xkcd Phone 12(xkcdフォン 12)

Full drivetrain warranty
Coated for easy swallowing
Surgical-grade apps
Built-in 600lb magnet for magnet fishing
Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque
40mL emergency water supply
Security feature: unmarked side buttons
3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches
99.9% BPA- and hands- free
Extended release charge cable
Closed timelike curves
Fits in standard shipping container
Interlocking, stackable
Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility
Sustain Pedal
CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves
 (アメリカ疾病予防管理センターパートナーシップ:人が多すぎる屋内空間では、電話は「We Like To Party!(The Vengabus)」の曲をゆっくりと音量を上げ、全員が去るまで再生し始める)
Sacrificial anode
Tactical helium reserve
50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)
Shake for factory reset
Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you

The xkcd Phone 12* and 12 Max**
 (XKCDフォン 12* と 12 Max**)

* Standard
** For people named Max

"The only phone you'll ever own"®™

Alt-text: New phone OS features: Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid), dark mode (disables screen), screaming mode (self-explanatory), and coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it).





 XKCDの作者、ランドール マンロー氏の著作本『ホワット・イフ?:野球のボールを光速で投げたらどうなるか』を紹介します。ウェブサイトに投稿された科学のおかしな質問を、XKCDばりの捻くれ方で回答し、それらを本にまとめたものです。こちらも面白いので是非に。

 この記事のカテゴリは、xkcd日本語訳(2020年) です。